Everything
by WriterFreak101
Summary: Oneshot songfic using Lifehouse's song "Everything." Katniss comes to realize that Peeta has always been there for her. He is the one who keeps her hoping. The scene at the end of the last chapter but before epilogue. Warning: Mockingjay spoilers.


**AN: I don't own _The Hunger Games_. Credit goes to Suzanne Collins for creating one of the most magnificent trilogies of our generation, and possibly one of the best of all time if I had to say anything about it. **

**I also don't own Lifehouse or their song, "_Everything_." I am just using their song for this songfic. All proper credit with this song goes to them. **

**I know this scene has been done hundreds of times. Still, I couldn't help myself. And don't worry, I'm still working on my SYOT. I just had to write this down. Now then, onward with the fic.**

**Everything**

Katniss Everdeen worked the primroses that grew along the side of her house. Weeds were trying to take over the bush and choke out the pretty flowers. After everything she had been through, Katniss refused to lose a battle with weeds. There was no way she was going to let them take over and choke out the flowers. The precious flowers which reminded her so much of her sister, Primrose. The one person in the world who she knew she had loved. The reason why she had sacrificed herself to enter the Games. The reason why she had kept on living.

The one who was lost in an explosion of flames.

The nightmares still haunted her. They slipped in her dreams in wispy fingers. Teasing her horridly, not leaving her alone. Refusing to go away no matter how many times she had tried to push them out. For months, all she could see was her sister being consumed by monstrous flames. Her sweet, innocent face which still bore a sense of maturity on it. Her golden blond hair turning to jet black, and then turning into dark, singed strands that then turned to dust.

The images of Prim, as she fondly called her sister, would forever haunt her. Plague her for the rest of her life. Along with countless other images. Images of war, terror, hatred, spite, fire, and roses. The scent of roses would forever make her shudder. Fused with blood, they would always remind her of the agony that she and countless other lives had suffered, still suffered. Some of it by her own actions too.

She doesn't know how long she does it, but she eventually conquered the weeds. Digging them out by the roots, patting the soil down once she had. Then took the weeds and throwing them in a bucket. At the end of the day she would use them to help her fire burn. Watching them turn from weeds into something charred and unrecognizable. Then after that into ashes and dust.

That's all it seemed to be in these days. Despite the Capitol's fall and the freedom of Panem, all Katniss could see was death. A death being brought on by flames. Turning everything into ash and dust.

Ash and dust.

In the end, that's what everything turned into.

Ash and dust.

In the end, that's all that was left. And before you could gather it, the wind would blow it away. Leaving you with nothing.

Ash and dust.

"Katniss?" a voice said behind her. She looked up from where she crouched, looking behind her and seeing Peeta Mellark standing there. After everything they had been through, Katniss still felt uncertain about him. The Capitol had taken him and twisted him around on her. Making him an uneasy presence in her life. The tracker jacker venom effects were still there. She could see him still digging his fingernails into his hand sometimes, as he tried to make sense of reality. And they still played the "real or not real" games.

Yet they were all that each other had left. Most of their loved ones had either died or had abandoned them. No longer able to care for the two people who had been scarred too deeply. Leaving them to live life alone together. After her return to District 12, only Greasy Sae seemed to care for Katniss. Coming by every day to help with the chores, making sure she had gotten something to eat. Always encouraging to hunt, or to care for the primroses, to do something besides mourning for all the ones who she had lost.

Katniss had wished that Greasy Sae would leave her alone. Just let her lay in bed so she could rot away. That was all she could be good for anyway. What could she possibly do anyway? The war had left her broken. She was the Mockingjay, and the war had clipped her wings. She would never be able to be truly happy again. Nightmares of children dying, friends losing their lives, and people abandoning her would continue to haunt her. She had absolutely nothing left to live for. Not that she didn't love Greasy Sae. She did. But she would never be able to replace the people who she had lost. Their lives used used to pay for the war.

But no, there was still one person left who she cared for. She still had Peeta Mellark. The boy with the bread. The one who had given her bread when she was starving. The one who had been her dandelion. The one who had professed his undying love for her on live television. The one who had fought to protect her in the arena. The one who had stood by her in the most difficult of situations. The one whose memories had been violated by the Capitol. The one who was struggling to come back to her. Despite all her attempts to push him away.

Could she really be that blind? Could she really be that horrible? What kind of person was she? Always so focused on her own survival that she was willing to let others suffer as long as she lived? Including a boy who had loved her and had suffered because of that love?

Peeta could have any girl he wanted. He was handsome, he was kind, he was a fantastic artist. Capable of creating the most amazing scenes with just a brush and a few paints. Able to channel his hurt, frustration, confusion, sorrows, fears, hopes, dreams, and desires onto a white canvas. He was braver than her in every way. He had the courage and the strength to still keep the images playing in his mind, the ones that had not been corrupted. And he used that ability to help others come to realize the pain that they had all suffered. Any girl would be lucky to have him.

And yet, he still wanted her. Out of all the others. He could have a girl who wouldn't treat his heart like dirt. Wouldn't tromp on it if it meant survival. Wouldn't damage it for the world. But he still wanted her. The girl whose wings had been clipped. The girl who had nothing. The girl who was selfish and bitter. The girl whose longing for survival had sparked a revolution which had cost the lives of countless people.

She wanted to hate him for it. How could he still be so good even after everything he had suffered? How was he able to do it?

She had realized she had been thinking so long, she must have been silent for a few minutes. Shaking herself from her thoughts, she looked at Peeta. He still stood there. His fingernails weren't burying themselves in his flesh. Which meant that at that moment, he was under control. The real Peeta. Not the one that the Capitol had created. That was good. Because Katniss had something she needed to say. Something that should have been said a long time ago. Something that was long overdue.

"Hey Peeta," she said. She got up from the ground and wiped the dirt that had collected on her knees. She took off her gardening gloves. "I haven't seen you all day."

"I was at the bakery. It's in business now. I even managed to hire a couple of workers and we sold three cakes and a few loaves of bread."

"Congratulations." The old Katniss, the one before the war, would have smiled. She would have beamed in pride for her friend. Smiling was not something that could be easily done these days though. Smiling was for those who lived joyful lives. The joy had been drained from her heart.

Peeta nodded. "Yeah. It feels good to be baking again. Gives me something to do. Brings back happy memories on occasion." He took a look at the primrose bush. It had been him who had planted the very bushes there. Had brought them out of the woods to her home. Just so that she could have something to care for. To help her.

Yet another reason why she didn't deserve him. Another reason why he deserved better. Might as well keep numbering the list and adding on pages. No doubt the list wasn't going to end. "I see you've been caring for the primroses."

"Usually twice a day, in the late morning and then in the evening. Weeds keep on coming in. So I always have to pull them out."

Peeta's eyebrows furrowed upward. "If you want, I could help you with that. You don't need to do it alone."

"No, it's fine. I'm glad. It gives me a reason to keep going on some days. Whenever I wake up and feel like I don't want to get out of bed, I always have to remember to care for the primrose bush." A stab of pain enters her heart. Caring for the primrose bush. Nurturing it. The whole concept reminded her too much of what it was like to care for her own little Primrose.

She saw Peeta grip her arms gently in his hands. He must have noticed her pain at the memory. "Come on," he said. "Let's get you inside. I can make tea."

"Greasy Sae probably made some already."

"Then I'll make more. Or something else if you like." He gently pulled her close to him as he began to walk her to her house.

_Find me here. _

_And speak to me._

The feeling of his presence beside her brought comfort. His words were soothing, even if they didn't seem very significant. Just an offer to help her. To be with her.

And yet, when those words came from his lips, they were much more to Katniss.

_I want to feel you. _

_I need to hear you. _

Katniss knew that if she was going to live life, she couldn't do it alone. Greasy Sae was sweet and kind, but she had family to take care of. She had a granddaughter who needed her attention. A business that needed her attention too. And besides, she wouldn't be around forever. She was already in her seventies. Soon somebody would have to start taking care of her.

Peeta would be there for her. He knew her suffering in too many ways to count. She had been the cause of some of those sufferings herself. Making him feel worthless, yelling at him, ignoring him. Given up on him. He never gave up on her though. At least not on purpose.

She needed to feel him and hear him.

_You are the light_

_That's leading me_

_To the place_

_Where I find peace_

Once they were inside the house Peeta sat her down in a chair while he went about to warming some water for tea. He reached into one of his side-pockets in his pants and pulled out a small plastic bag with cookies in it. He set a couple of them on a plate in front of her. Katniss looked at them. They were round cookies, and smelled as if they were just pulled out of the oven. They had forest green icing on them. Her favorite color. The color that represented life and security. The color that always provided her with food. Survival.

She took one cookie in her hand, and felt the warmth seep into her flesh. Her scarred flesh. The flesh that not even in the Capitol, with its amazing abilities in making someone look like a god on earth, could fix.

Katniss knew then that Peeta had made these especially for her. She turned to him. He stood on the opposite side of the kitchen, she said, "Thanks Peeta." She took a bite of the cookie. The sweetness of the icing and the freshness of the cookie hit her tongue. Taking her back to times before misery seemed to accompany every moment in life.

_Again..._

"You're welcome. I managed to bake them even though we were kind of busy. I was surprised they didn't burn."

"They're perfect."

_You are the strength_

_That keeps me walking_

Peeta walked over to the table. He chose to remain standing though instead of taking a chair. Katniss looked up at him. Traces of a smile played on his lips. The shadows of the boyish grin he use to give. "I like making you happy."

_You are the hope_

_That keeps me trusting._

"I don't understand why you do it."

"Do what?" Peeta asked, slightly confused.

_You are the life_

_To my soul._

"Why you still care for me. I mean, I've done nothing that deserves your care. Yet you still do."

_You are my purpose._

_You're everything. _

"You aren't getting rid of me that easily Katniss. Not after everything we've been through."

_And how can I _

_Stand here with you_

_And not be moved by you?_

"Why though? Why do you? I mean, you can have any girl in District 12. Any girl in Panem. But you still want me."

_Would you tell me_

_How could it be_

_Any better than this? _

Peeta looked Katniss in the eyes. His expression was serious and caring. Compassionate and honest. Tender and loving. How could he still be those things after everything that had been done to him? His body injured. His family killed. His memories hijacked. How?

She saw him gently place his hand on one of hers. His hand bore some of the similar scars that she bore. They both had been caught in fires that nearly burned their flesh off of them. His attained more scars from the times he dug his fingernails in his hands. "Cause out of all of them, you are still the one that has left a lasting impression."

_Yeah..._

"What kind of impression? A girl who has lost her mind? Who's so depressed she can barely pull herself out of bed in the morning? Who can't even treat you decently?"

"No," Peeta said. "You want to know what I see when I look at you Katniss? I see a girl who may sometimes be a coward, a girl who sometimes may be selfish, a girl who can be stubborn and unwilling to let go of pain-"

Katniss felt anger sweep through her. Abruptly she stood up, and balled her fists up. She punched him square in the chest. He didn't even stop it. Just stood as she punched him square in the chest as hard as she could. She cried and screamed obscenities at him. When she finally finished, she felt a croak escape her throat, and she burst into tears. She buried her face into his shoulder and felt herself breaking apart. Everything hurt. She was damaged in every possible way a person could be damaged. And her love for Peeta, one of the few good things that she had after the many months that had passed since they had started to grow back together, was causing her even more pain. Why? Why even bother caring anymore? All caring ever did was bring more heartbreak.

She felt his hand reach behind her and start to circle her back. She sniffled. More guilt flooded her. She felt like she was choking on it now.

"You know you didn't let me finish," Peeta said.

Katniss had to choke back a sob, but she managed to get out, "Fine then, go ahead. Finish. I don't care. I already know you only care about me because I'm nothing but shambled pieces. It's not even caring though, it's pity. That's why you 'love' me. You think I'm just a bird with a broken wing and you have to take care of it."

"I was going to say," Peeta continued, "that even with all the faults you have, I still see in the good inside you. I see a person who is caring, loyal, trustworthy, determined, strong and compassionate.

Katniss opened her mouth to deny it. Deny every word he had used to describe her. But he held her, and she found herself unable to. Instead, all she could do was listen as Peeta said, "That's why I love you Katniss. Because when I look at you, I see a girl who volunteered herself to replace her sister in the most disgusting Games in the world. I see a girl who can sing so beautifully the mockingjays stop to listen. I see a girl who, when she witnessed her ally murdered before her eyes, she was inspired to rebel against it. Not because she just wanted to survive. But because she knew it was wrong, and something needed to be done. I see a girl who hated killing even her enemies. I see a girl who risked her life for me, no matter what the stakes were. To me, you're more than just a bird whose wings had been clipped. You are much more than that. Always have, always will."

_You calm the storms_

_You give me rest_

Katniss slowly started to pull herself together. She looked into Peeta's eyes. Blue and beautiful. Gentle and caring. The eyes that could see the beauty in almost everything. The eyes that could be serious one moment, and jolly the next. The eyes that could be sensitive when the time was called on, or strong as a rock when needed.

_You hold me in your hands_

_You won't let me fold_

He was the one person who had always been there. In the times when he was in control of himself and had not been perverted by the Capitol. He had been there when she was nearly starving to death, before they were in the Arena, in the Arena itself, and had always been there for her after the Arena itself. Always been there for her, yet it was always been her who had pushed him away.

_You steal my heart_

_You take my breath away. _

She had loved him. Granted, she had not always been certain about how she had loved him. Life had just made things too complicated. And that was part of the reason why she had kept pushing him away. But she had loved him nevertheless.

Now though, she knew. She knew that she was done pushing him away. She knew she had pushed him away too long. She knew now that she loved him.

_You take me in_

_Take me deeper now..._

He was her dandelion. The one that always bloomed when the spring came. Willing to always pull her into his love when she needed it and when she didn't. The one that had taught her to hope.

She wanted to continue being caught up in his love. Wanted him to love her like he always had. Like he always had since they were little, even before she knew that he had a crush on her.

_And how can I_

_Stand here with you_

_And not be moved by you? _

How could she not love him?

_Would you tell me_

_How could it be_

_Any better than this? _

Who could treat her any better?

_And how can I_

_Stand here with you_

_And not be moved by you? _

'You could live a hundred lifetimes and never deserve him,' Haymitch had said to her once. Back then, Katniss knew he was right. She had always known it was true. Even if she could live a _thousand_ lifetimes, her goodness in those lifetimes would never be able to compare to Peeta's goodness in just one. She didn't deserve his love.

But that didn't stop Peeta. He still loved her, even in her worst moods.

_Would you tell me _

_How could it be_

_Any better than this?_

With Peeta, how could things be any better than what they were?

And in that moment, Katniss did the one thing that she had done countless times before. But for the first time, she was absolutely sure about what the meaning was behind it. She kissed him. Her lips touched his, and the warmth of his lips seemed to spread from them and onto her, filling her body from head to toe. It wasn't a kind of heat that was like fire though, the heat that fueled anger and hatred. It was heat that brought warmth to the body and the soul. Thawing the ice of a heart that had frozen over and breathing life back into it.

_Cause you're all I want_

_You're all I need_

_You're everything, everything_

She could feel his lips kissing her as well. For a moment they stood there, enjoying the feel of the other's lips on their own.

_You're all I want_

_You're all I need_

_You're everything, everything_

She could feel his hands, warm from working in the bakery, rough from all the physical activity it took, scarred from all the experiences they had gone through, patient from icing the cakes, tender from holding a brush in his hand as he captured a scene on blank parchment, gently rest on her cheeks. She in turn placed her hands gently on his chest. His solidness not giving way.

_You're all I want _

_You're all I need_

_You're everything, everything_

They had been smashed, bashed, and crashed. They had been through things nobody their age should had ever been through. Been through what nobody should have gone through.

_You're all I want_

_You're all I need_

_You're everything, everything_

There was nothing that could be done about it though. What happened, happened. They didn't have to like it. But they had to accept it. Accept it for the sake of being able to live on. To be able to go through life without having the weight of the past chaining them down. So that they wouldn't make themselves so depressed that they ended up tuning the world out around them.

_And how can I _

_Stand here with you_

_And not be moved by you?_

There had been times when Katniss had questioned that philosophy. But she had finally come to realize it was true. You may go through heartbreak and tragedy. One moment people would be in your life, the next moment they would be gone. There were times when the road was dark and cold and bumpy. But no matter what, it was never a mistake to keep living. Because despite the horror and tragedy and loss that was in the world, there was still some good. And it was worth living for.

_Would you tell me_

_How could it be_

_Any better_

_Any better than this?_

_Yeah! _

And that was why, when they finally broke away, with the evening sun starting to fade away and the moon starting to take its place, when Peeta asked: "You love me, real or not real?"

_You're everything!_

She replied..."Real."

_You're everything!_

As he placed his lips on hers, she knew then and there she had made the right decision. Life was going to be rough. But with Peeta, everything would be alright.

_You're everything!_

After all, he was her everything.


End file.
